I'm here in a ticky ulster and a broken billycock hat
And I'm layin' on to the sergeant I don't know a gun from a bat
Me shirt's doin' duty for jacket, me socks stickin out of me boots
And I'm learnin' the damned old goose step along with the new recruits
I'm back to the army again, Segeant! Back to the army again
How did I learn to do right about-turn?
I am back to the army again

A man of four an twenty what hasn't learned of a trade
Except 'reserve' against him, he'd better be never made
I tried me luck for a porter, that was enough for me
Then I thought of her majesty's barracks, I thought I would just go and see
I'm back to the army again, Segeant! Back to the army again
Who woulda thought I could carry and port?
I am back to the army again

The sergeant asked no questions but he winked the other eye
When he says to me 'SHUN!' and I shunted the same as in days gone by
He saw the set of me shoulders; I couldnt help holdin' em straight
When me and the other rookies came under the barrack gate
I'm back to the army again, Segeant! Back to the army again
'Tisn't my fault if I dress when I halt
I am back to the army again

I took me bath and I wallered 'coz gawd I needed it so
I smelt the smell of the barracks, and I 'eard the bugles go
I 'eard the feet on the gravel, the feet of the men what drill
And I says to me fluttering heart strings, says to em 'Peace, be still'
I'm back to the army again, Segeant! Back to the army again
Who said I knew when the troop ship was due?
I am back to the army again

I carried me slops to the tailor, and I says to him 'none of yer lip
You tighten em over the shoulders and loose em off over the hip
Because the set of the tunic is horrid!' and he says to me 'Strike me dead!
But i thought you was used to the business' but of course he done what I said
I'm back to the army again, Segeant! Back to the army again
Rather too free with me fancies 'What me!?'
I am back to the army again

Next week I'll have em fitted and I'll buy me a swagger cane
They'll set me free of the barracks, to walk on the hoe again
In the name of William Parsons which used to be Edward Clay
And any poor bugger who wants it can claim me fourpence a day
I'm back to the army again, Segeant! Back to the army again
Out of the wind and the rain, Seargeant
Out of the wind and the rain

'Oo's there!?'
A man too good to be lost to you
A man that is handled and made
A man that will earn what he's cost you
In learning the others their trade
'PARADE!'
You're dropping the pick of the army
Because you won't help us remain
You drive us to cheat
To get out of the street
And get back to the army again